yeshua

25. EVERLASTING BIRTH PANGS

Late in spring, Steve and I were at Lowes buying veggies for the garden. He left me with a cart full of plants to go get something in the warehouse…a dangerous thing cause I LOVE flowers. Some dahlias called so I knelt to find the one that wanted to come home with me when I was approached by a tiny, slightly bent, very wrinkled, delightfully enthusiastic ancient Native American woman.

“Come, come. You must see these flowers.” She beckoned pushing a walker cart. I was enchanted by her energy and followed her. “These are the flowers for you.”

She showed me some bright yellow and pink annuals. “Touch them,” she insisted. The flowers were dry, perfectly preserved. I was amazed. “Strawflowers!” She exclaimed. “They’re for you.” I yearned to give her a big hug, but she was so tiny and fragile, I just caressed her shoulder as I thanked her. How could I not buy one?

So I planted a bright yellow strawflower in front and forgot about it…until last Memorial Day. I was on my way to finish my sculpture…and had an uneasy feeling all weekend. Driving over to Grandmother Kathy’s house filled with a familiar feeling of anticipation peppered by trepidation, I was transported back to 1984 driving to UCLA to pick up my first born from the NICU, excited but a little scared. My whole life would change when I brought him home. And now my life was changing again.

I cried the moment Kathy hugged me. “What’s wrong?” About to bring home another life changing creation, I knew that I would never be the same again.

My sculpture came out of the kiln relatively unscathed (a slight crack in the horse’s neck and her left knee…we all have birthmarks and scars, don’t we?) The retouch staining went well, but alas Kathy did not have the right glue to attach the crystal amethyst wings to the ceramic back of the woman so off we went to Lowes.

And Kathy led me right over to a lovely display of strawflowers. “Do you know what these are?” I nodded, as a matter of fact I did, and shared the story of the ancient flower woman with her. She was very excited and after getting the glue and another strawflower plant for each of us, we headed back to her house to attach the wings.

As we waited for the glue to dry, Kathy brought out an essential oil…Helichrysum…she said was from strawflower…yet I knew in holding the tiny vial…that wasn’t quite right…I envisioned a rougher plant… I was hesitant to smell it…She wondered why and I explained that certain odors are powerful memory inducers for me…finally I did…

…and I was in the tomb anointing Yeshua’s hands and feet. Then I went further back to just before the Seder…opening the alabaster jar, Judas reacted to the scent of the helichrysum…not the spikenard, frankincense or myrrh, but the helichrysum because…it was used to heal wounds, to revive…to resurrect…and now he had to do what was asked of him…he didn’t believe and the others, well, they didn’t know what was going on…Then I saw myself well before that last Passover collecting tiny dried yellow flowers from a rough lavender looking plant and simmering them in olive oil until the essence was extracted….Tears poured down my cheeks as I remembered…

Kathy was amazed…she called the essence “everlasting” Afterwards I looked it up online (I love my smart phone!) and found the plant from which the oil is derived….it looked like what I envisioned and the Latin name is “Immortelle”…

I found research on helichrysum for use in gingivitis. I decided to try it on my gums…Steve’s reaction to the smell was strong…he said it made him feel “very upset… please don’t use it again, please” My Mom found it healing, so much so just smelling it relieved a headache… Kathy had the same reaction as Mom…

Now once again I’m astride two worlds…as Jarys would say…the past and the present. Or if there is no time…I’m floating in my river of consciousness between the banks of what was and what will be.

Excerpt from My LoveDance. Available on Amazon

Go with the Flow

Writing the wedding scene in LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter was confusing and enlightening. I dreamt of two different ceremonies and then tried to put them together into one scene. My computer ate that chapter! Struggling, I called my rabbi friend. She confirmed that there were in fact two ceremonies in first century Hebrew culture.

So I learned to surrender to the process of creation. Flowing with the visions and the dreams, I became one with Mary and as she awakened so did I.

Find out why Yeshua does not veil his bride in the third chapter—Becoming As One.

May you always flow peacefully.

Blessings of love and light,

Deborah

Disentangle Your Cords of Attachment

We tend to become entangled with those we love, those we hate, those we have any strong emotion. The old paradigm is to cut the cords of attachment, but we can never cut ourselves off from anything in creation. The time is ripe to learn a new paradigm. Learning to disentangle from others can be a challenge and a blessing.

“As we loosen our bindings to this reality, the hayye (energy) of potential can shift. When we surrender those we love to the One, we free them to experience life without the limitations of our relationship.”
From page 453 of LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter

Here’s an article I wrote on how to Disentangle Your Cords of Attachment

May you be Free to Receive Abundant Joy,

Deborah

LoveDance is HerStory!

LOVEDANCE: AWAKENING THE DIVINE DAUGHTER reveals intimate details of Mary Magdalen’s relationship with Christ. Unlike other works of fiction seeking to cast history’s most controversial woman in the mold of accepted scripture, LOVEDANCE breaks the mold to unveil Mary Magdalen as Yeshua’s sacred partner—sexually and spiritually. History draws a one dimensional patriarchal view of the man known as Jesus. HERstory paints a multidimensional sacred feminine portrait vibrantly colored by the passion of the time.

LOVEDANCE is HERstory.

Author Deborah Maragopoulos FNP is an intuitive integrative family nurse practitioner who conceived her debut novel through dreams and visions. “I set out to write a healing book but after dreaming I was Mary Magdalen, she became my muse. Forever changed by HERstory, I realize LOVEDANCE is the healing book I was meant to write.” Those who dare to open themselves to the gift of LOVEDANCE discover precious insights, layers of spiritual truths, and a deep connection with the Divine.

“LOVEDANCE takes the story of Mary Magdalen and Christ to another level… everything the characters are experiencing is described so the reader can feel it, see it, smell it…works on the spiritual level. Being that Christ had so many gifts, this seems more like how his life was…” Readers Views

Readers Choice Best Spiritual Fiction

LOVEDANCE: AWAKENING THE DIVINE DAUGHTER;

by Deborah Maragopoulos FNP; 552 pages, Softcover, $25

Profits benefit Divine Daughters Unite

What is LoveDance?

Most of you know me as an intuitive healer, a hormone expert…and that I teach through story.
Well, LoveDance is the story of a young woman coming into her Sacred Feminine power through intimate relationships. It’s the story of awakening to the truth of our being…as told by its heroine—Mary Magdalen.

“After hearing about LoveDance, I ordered it immediately and could hardly put it down while reading. It has been a wonderful journey. All my life have I felt a big connection to Maria Magdalena and this connection has been enhanced with this book. I find in myself many of the qualities of the Divine Daughter: dance, sexuality, seduction, innocence, strong connection within, inner wisdom and power and ability to see the best in people (I could go on). It is so lovely to have read your book and recognize and awake these qualities within myself.”

Marleen Renders

I meant to write a book on hormones and natural healing when I dreamt I was Mary dancing down the streets of Nazareth. In the ten years since Mary’s story came through me, I awakened to my Sacred Feminine wisdom. My relationships have healed and blossomed. I am living my LoveDance.

And so many readers have shared Mary’s journey through LoveDance and have healed as well.

“Thank you for such a beautiful book. Oh my G-D! Your book encompasses the best of everything I ever read. I absolutely adored it. Provocative, engaging, universal truths expressed through a fabulous character—so loveable and believable. “

Thank you, Gretchen Monak, La Jolla CA

Healing the body is often the focus of medicine, yet without addressing soul issues, physical healing is difficult.

“What an experience. There was a beautiful transmission and healing that happened to me in reading this book…..I met the divine embodied feminine. I didn’t read LoveDance with my mind; I read it with my body. Thank you, Deborah.”

Susan Dasch MFT PhD, San Diego CA

In LoveDance, I address relationship issues, parenting issues, letting go,
disentangling cords of attachment, the process of death and dying, the symbolism of disease– all through the eyes, voice, and heart of a woman that history mal aligned.

“My life study has been Mary Magdalene. I have followed any story known since I was about 3 years old. Even then I knew that the church was off in their statements about her. I knew she was “The Beloved” of Jesus. I have found “Love Dance” to warm my heart and feed my soul in the most loving experience of Mary I have ever danced with. I find the history and actual Jewish law to be most accurate in the story again placing a smile on my face as I read, the truth shall indeed set us free.
I love this Dance and I love Deborah for having the spirit to bring it into life.”

Thank you so very much.
Ondinnonk, Anae Campbell ND PhD New Mexico

Unveiling HerStory was difficult. What I saw in visions and dreams did not match what I was taught, yet much of what I wrote has been discovered since. Perhaps when one of us remembers, all begin to heal.

May You Embody Your LoveDance,

Deborah Maragopoulos

Deborah Maragopoulos MN FNP-BC

Conscious Creators

“Most humans create unconsciously. Unaware that their thoughts are being fueled by their emotion, they believe that their existence is a destiny beyond their control. Creation is a simple formula—Clear Intention coupled with Pure Desire in Ripe Timing—becomes manifestation. I ask that each of you consider yourselves as conscious creators.”

Yeshua from page 492 of LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter

The Father and I are One

Since the beginning of the year, the 11th of each month has felt…well, different. After the Japanese earthquake, I was sure I wasn’t the only one feeling the 11^th. So I googled it and found the 11^th of each month described as vibrational portals leading to 11-11-11. On 4-11-11, I felt compelled to hold ceremony so I called up Grandmother Kathy and took her to the beach. In sacred ceremony we gifted the ocean with the intention of healing the earth. I felt this intense energy coming from the sun…no actually through the sun and recognized the galactic center blessing us. On the wet low tide sands, I danced the sacred union of Father Sun and Mother Earth…what an amazing experience!

Lately, I keep seeing multiples of 11 every time I look at the clock (11, 22, 33, 44). I looked up the significance of these master numbers and calculated my numerology number by birth date and it is 22…but still this doesn’t settle my soul…something more is up.

On Monday, in spite of having accomplished everything I need before our vacation commenced, I awoke with a vague melancholy. Then I realized the date…7-11-11…and felt compelled to hold ceremony again…but what? Trusting all would be well I opened my journal in hopes of inspiration and…. it came to me…

…These portals are DNA activations! In alignment with the chakra’s…the first three were not as noticeable to me (I can only guess that these layers are well activated by Genesis Gold), the fourth felt like a celebration of the heart chakra…Love… the fifth and sixth were subtle, yet this seventh was in alignment with work I’ve been doing regarding the Pineal gland. And I have always known the crown chakra to be a connection to the heavens, the multi-dimensional universe. Perhaps why we bow our head in prayer, exposing our crowns to the mouth of God.

At the same time, healing the split with the Divine Masculine has come up in my women’s circle. I began this work exactly a year ago, composing and publishing two articles regarding the Divine Masculine before I was hit with Death…there my focus lie for months through the Karmic Imprint retreat and well after as I released all that no longer served my soul.

I have taken steps to heal my relationship with my own father and while it’s going well, still the Divine Masculine is up again…wanting to be healed in my soul, in the collective feminine, in the world…

I spent my early days as the divine child…androgynous in my being…then embodied the divine son energy using my mind to make my mark in the world, emerging ever so cautiously as the divine daughter…first as lover, then wife, then mother, then peace, oh blessed peace with my sacred femininity as I consumed the bounty of the Earth Mother in Genesis Gold. Then I wrote my experience in LoveDance…the Divine Daughter well rooted in me…that was 8 years ago…over the past year and a half, struggling to compose book two of the LoveDance series, I have been excavating the father wound…naming it, writing it, praying about it, then acting upon it. Knowing that this year, 2011—the year I celebrate my 50^th birthday—the time is finally ripe to become whole.

During a guided meditation in my women’s circle, I saw an image of my higher self. And felt compelled to create Her into form. I took my joy to my Q&A journal where I converse with my higher self and she assured me that my hands would “remember” how to form clay. And they did…

Ascencion

This sculpture that I created under the midwifery of Grandmother Kathy—I call Her, Ascencion—is my Higher Self formed from clay. Not only feminine, but in sacred union with the masculine. That is who I am now. She is who I’ve become in my 50 years on earth. Finally balanced.

When it was time to bring Her home after months of work, I was feeling trepidation. Excitement, yet trepidation too. Then I was cast back to 1984, driving to UCLA to pick up Jarys from the NICU…my life forever changed then…and now it would be changed again.

Since bringing Ascencion home, my life has changed. My relationship has deepened even more with my beloved husband. My relationship with my mother has become more refined. I have truly released my son and he is blossoming. My daughter grows in leaps and bounds and no longer am I entangled with her. My relationship with my sisters is blooming…no drama at the last family gathering. And being with my father was joyous….Thank God!

After witnessing the heartfelt struggle with patriarchy from the women in my circle, I took my heavy heart to my beloved husband who shone some divine masculine light of wisdom upon me. Then I sat in counsel with my higher self, consulted with wise women and wondered when this Father Wound would be finally healed. For Blossoming Spirit—the theme of our upcoming retreat—to emerge at the fall equinox, balance must be reached.

Before we met for our first planning meeting, crow left me a feather…I was bringer of the Triple Goddess Tarot Cards from which our women’s circle would choose. I had tied the triple goddess colors of white, red, and black around the crow feather and the eldest “crone” of our circle used the feather to divine the card. Blossoming Spirit was chosen—card number 5, the hierophant—with a strong rejuvenation theme. Just what I dreamt for our next retreat.

For three weeks, I asked crow for another feather having given up the beautiful one to the circle. And only after I abandoned the search and went on a carefree run with Charlie in the meadow to find a black and white feather…balance…only then did crow grace me with a pure black feather under the orange tree—where I pick sunshine to consume every morning before greeting my animals and old man crow!

So on 7-11-11 at 11:11 dressed in violets, I lay under my oak tree to meditate.

And for the first time since I was a child, I felt the presence of Father God. He spoke to me. Explaining that it took this long for me to bond well with the Divine Mother, to discover my truth and transform from human doing to human being…to live as the embodiment of the Divine Daughter and encompass Divine Mother energy into my life with deep honoring of the Divine Grandmother.

He showed me how easily I partnered with the Divine Masculine in Steve and received it in other men. How bravely I tried to heal my relationship with my father …yet still I searched for guidance from the Divine Father.

In answer to my heart prayers of healing the father wound, He came.

And showed me, me as light! A juicy brilliant orange-red began the light show and I felt filled from root to belly…hormonally rejuvenated. Then lime green darkening to peridot as the light rose from solar plexus to heart. The greens deepened to a glorious teal, fluid and dancing with lovely lilac in the center…my heart filled. Then my throat alighted in clear blue, brilliant as the sky and here where I hold trepidation, finally healed by the blue light of truth. Then my head filled with violet, not purple of my youth, but a deep violet that circled around to red and became fuchsia. My new auric color! He showed me that I’ve come full circle and begin again at 50.

The communication was long and deep. For I saw my own DNA dancing. Not the double helix formation but a spiraling spherical star of DNA, many layers deep, no, not layers, He said, not stacked but intertwined, and I looked deeper and saw brilliant strands dancing figure eights of infinity, meeting in the center of the star sphere, some switching partners, some dancing in triplets…Seven lit up brilliantly…four more dancing in the shadows, and the last yet to be enlightened.

All the while Father God spoke to me. He explained how he watched over me all this time through the eyes of crow. My deep connection to this magical black bird that so many fear…it was serving My Father. The one I turned away from so long ago.

No judgment, no sorrow during this glorious reunion with My Father. Only light and love. Exactly what I ask for every time I feel fear. That my fear be lifted and I be filled with light and love. And now I know it has been Him…answering my prayers.

Oh, I am still very much one with My Mother. She flows through me….and I felt Her great Joy as I received Him. She held me in her arms as She presented me, Her Divine Daughter, to My Father. I am so blessed.

I arose at 11:55, 44 minutes in divine communication. I am profoundly affected…the light was so healing…I know now what Yeshua meant by My Father and I are One.

24 Remembering Mary Magdalen: Torn between two loves

May 15^th, 2004 Steve voiced his concern about me calling a distant friend for support. Apologizing I searched for the source of his concern and could see that I am not fully attending to him, not fully present. Yeshua says Steve has waited so very long and this remembrance is a reminder of his burden of responsibility. Now Steve has an aching need to fulfill me, desires to be everything for me—lover, friend, husband, father of my children, provider, protector, confidante. He wants to be my partner, following me into this life as always but this time finally rewarded as my first and last. If I would have had this remembrance earlier in our life, perhaps we wouldn’t have bonded. Steve truly cherishes me, totally devoted to us. I have so much to be thankful for. With his light so deep verdant green, Steve is a co-creator in his own right, feeling disenchanted because his garden hasn’t grown, but it is my pulling away from us that saps the energy of our property. He provides the structure, I am the life force. How lost I get in self!

May 20^th, 2004 There is so much emotional struggle pulling this book together. The computer process is killing me! I am at the mercy of my technical ineptness. This was supposed to be easy, but ever since luring others into the drama, the fear of coming out overshadows the joy of creation. One’s knee jerk reaction to all that is Christian really riles me. Unconvinced that Christianity haled from Judaism, she even rejects the rabbi’s input. Yet still I take to heart her fears perhaps because they are a mirror of my own doubts. I have researched so many religions over the years and can see the connections, the shared themes in Judaism, Islam, Christianity, even Pagan beliefs. I have learned in this remembrance to sift through the mud to find the pearls. Early on I too had wrenching reactions to the “good and evil” language which Jarys allayed for me by explaining that it wasn’t part of the original Hebrew but adopted during the Babylonian captivity to blend with Zoroastrian philosophy. I believe Yeshua was a mystic, a teacher swimming against the tide …a hippy of his time!

18 Remembering Mary Magdalen: Passionate Me

March 14^th, 2004 These cords of attachment run deep and long. In the ethers we release them, in our bodies we struggle with their remnant energy—the habit of being attached. We respond to the fiery emotion that cast the cords into metal chains to bind us. It is not easy being human, but it is divine. We are never alone although the work is done secretly in our heart under the watch of our mind’s eye.

March 17^th, 2004 Seeing the Passion of Christ affected me not as I expected. With Yeshua’s ethereal support, I rose into a place of compassionate observation understanding that the depiction is through the filter of fear. Jarys had a tremendous opening seeing that pain, suffering, even death is all of the One, that the two flames are One, that the One is within. He argued with Yeshua through me about returning to fix the mess his followers have created. Yeshua explained that the second coming is an awakening of a christed consciousness within each of us, spurred in part by the book.

March 20^th, 2004 On my birthday, adoration comes up in a sense of awe for who I am, for creation, for those I love. Looking into Steve’s eyes, I see his awakening. As I release him he settles and meets me. Gathering the disciples in the writing, presenting them with compassion is a blessed chore. What confuses me most is who they are in this life, but I see flavors of each in many. Perhaps it’s the mitosis again. Once there was a Judas who now lives in many, some hold the guilt of the myth, some more like the Judas I remember—a bear of a man with honey inside.

14 Remembering Mary Magdalen: Dancing in the New Year

Jan 2^nd, 2004 Dropping Kyra off on New Years eve, I strove to meet the parents holding the teen gathering. Somehow the book came up. I have no hesitancy sharing this amazing experience with friends and family, but these were strangers. And they asked if I was Christian. And I said no but neither were Mary and Yeshua. They were Hebrew. The looks on their faces made me realize why Steve worries so. He’s preparing for crosses to be burned on the lawn when this book comes out. In spite of the controversial nature of my story, I must have faith that all will be well. This said, how hard it is to humanize Yeshua—but to me he was very much a man who felt love, anger, jealousy, joy. Yesterday during our new year’s hike, Steve was in a sweet mood, proclaiming to be able to take care of all of my needs, to never get lost, to provide me food and shelter no matter where, to lick my very wounds if need be. Although I yearn for a more ethereal connection, Steve grounds me to this 3 dimensional reality. After finishing the forgiveness piece between Mary and her mother, I felt great gratitude for how each member of my family, each person who has served to teach me lessons along the way back to the One. So this morning when I meditated on a disturbing scene, I know I cannot judge what seems like an incomplete memory. How many times have I envisioned parts of this story only to sit down to write and what flows from my hands more beautifully insightful than I imagined?

Jan 12^th, 2003 Last night we celebrated Steve’s birthday at the Greek restaurant and the belly dancer enticed me to get up and dance by offering me her zils—an ancient gesture of recognition just like when Miriam led the Yisraelites in celebratory dance at the Red Sea. It was amazing and our friends commented on how “tribal” I danced. Somehow I knew how to dance this ancient rhythm, perhaps because I had just written a scene in which Mary danced in celebration of the new moon. At the last science and consciousness conference in Albuquerque, I joined the dance of universal peace and got lost in the ancient rhythms. Afterwards many approached to thank me for my presence asking if I was a professional dancer. Surprised and flattered, I shared my experience with a friend who was a ballroom dancer. She took offense claiming I had no training. True, but at the African drumming circle at the end of the conference, I could not help but dance with the energies. So I danced the drums and the drummer seemed to drum my beat—an erotic meeting of souls through music.