“Most humans create unconsciously. Unaware that their thoughts are being fueled by their emotion, they believe that their existence is a destiny beyond their control. Creation is a simple formula—Clear Intention coupled with Pure Desire in Ripe Timing—becomes manifestation. I ask that each of you consider yourselves as conscious creators.”
Yeshua from page 492 of LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter
My journey began with a dream…I am fourteen year old Mary dancing down the streets of Nazareth. Through LoveDance, I remembered myself as the Sacred Feminine. I became the Divine Daughter. I reconnected to the Divine Mother. It took eight months to write. And three years to publish.
In Book II, I realized that I Am The Way. I healed an ancient father wound and remembered my connection to the Divine Masculine. It took five years to write. I pray it does not take long to publish…
Each book became my life. The sensuality, the realizations, the remembrance of my gifts, the healing, the connections. Many have found healing in the pages of LoveDance. For those who have trouble connecting to the written word, I pray it becomes a movie.
I need connections to the publishing world at large, major media to really bring Mary’s Sacred Journey to Light. For her life, as I remember it, was very human, very enlightening, sensual, loving and real. She has taught me much about love, about gratitude, about commitment, about releasing fear and receiving the gift of every encounter.
Now I begin the writing of Book III. In a different vein, a more realized energy, this time even more supported by my beloved. Each book has been a deeper awakening for us. He was afraid for me when I began to write LoveDance. It is a curse and a blessing to be chosen as my rabbi friend once told me. I had a difficult time in conceiving the first book. It was hard to be Deborah while remembering Mary. I vowed to not lose myself in book II and I didn’t. Yet it took so long to write because it took so long to remember the ancient father wound and then to heal it in my own life and plant a new seed for consciousness. LoveDance is not just a women’s book. Book II is the time most known by historians and theologians yet I believe they only know the male version of the story. In LoveDance Book II, I unveil the female version for both men and women.
Ten years after beginning LoveDance, my beloved took me to the south of France for our 30th wedding anniversary. I have done little research in writing the LoveDance series. The scenes come in dreams and visions. As I dive deeper into HerStory, pieces are remembered by family and friends. Some they recognize, some they just deliver unknowing to me, usually after I meditate for an opening. It’s all good, all as it is meant to be.
I have seen scenes of Book III since the beginning. They haunted me until I had a deeper understanding and a more divine perspective. I felt drawn to the south of France…perhaps there in what was once Roman Gaul seeds of truth were buried in some of the legends. I discovered some pearls in the mud of misperception. More so, I discovered a great reverence for the Magdalen scattered throughout Provence. For that I am grateful. For Mary’s sake, for woman’s sake, for all of us.
One thing I learned in writing LoveDance is that life at least for me is about Joyous Service. My husband and I are both in helping professions—he as a police officer and me as a family nurse practitioner. The stories we share at the dinner table of our respective work day are often quite similar. As a healer, I spend a lot of time educating my patients, counseling them, guiding them with heartfelt advice. As a police officer, Steve protects and serves…truly he is more of a peace officer. There is not enough room in this blog to record all the incidences of him helping others through their issues.
Last year, we stopped in Santa Barbara for brunch on the way up to our favorite romantic getaway in Cambria. While we were dining, a gentleman greeted Steve with such profound respect and gratitude. I asked about him and Steve said that some 20 years ago, he arrested him. Before the man was imprisoned, Steve advised him to use the experience to help him grow. “And he did!” Steve said proudly, “He paid back society and became a responsible outstanding citizen raising a fine family in our town.” You see, we both take care of those in need.
Last evening after an impromptu date—dinner on the pier and a stroll through a summer street fair, I was making Steve’s lunch. My daughter teases that even though she and her brother are gone, I’m still packing lunches. A dear friend of mine just reminded me how I showed her years ago how to cut the kids sandwiches into shapes. I used to put little notes in their lunches—words of encouragement, of love, of hope.
Well, as I was making Steve’s lunch, I felt my grandmother’s presence. Nana used to do so much for Poppop, most of which he could have done for himself, yet she needed to do it. Serving him fulfilled her. And he was always extremely grateful. My mother served my father in the same fashion…yet something was missing. It was more of an expectation of how wives and husbands act. They divorced after 24 years of marriage. My grandparents were married over 40 years; unfortunately they died young. Poppop was only 62. Nana followed him to the grave twenty months later. She stayed around just long enough to hold her first great-grandchild, my son—Jarys. I have a photo of her cradling him in her arms. She was dying of lung cancer, in a wheelchair with a cannula of oxygen hanging from her nostrils. He’s only three pounds—born ten weeks premature—under the eerie glow of the neonatal intensive care unit, gazing at her intently. She died shortly after that one and only visit. I miss both my Nana and Pop.
But last night, Nana was with me as I prepared Steve’s lunch. Holding the energy of love as I sliced the left over steak, washed and tore the baby lettuce, arranged the roma tomato. As I made vinaigrette, I felt her guiding me…a pinch of Italian herbs, a little salt, a bit of pepper sprinkled into the olive oil and balsamic vinegar.
When I was done, I found Steve doing his back exercises in the bedroom. “Why do we take such care of one another?” I asked.
“Because we love each other so much.” He smiled and gave me a kiss.
True, but I think it’s more. You see, he takes care of me so well. He cooks for me…and he’s an amazing chef…he took care of the kids with the finesse of any mother…he spends time with me…and enjoys it! After 27 years of marriage we are still very much in love. We are best friends, each other’s truest confidantes.
Yet we have lives outside of us….I do my things…I have a circle of dear women I meet with regularly, a very spiritual supportive group. I love horses and can be found riding far and wide on my mare all over Ojai. I meet with my three sisters once or twice a year for a girls’ weekend and regularly spend girls’ time with my daughter. I work with my mother (she’s my office manager) but we “play” well together too.
And he does his “guy” things. A yearly backpacking trip with old friends. Lunch and golfing with new ones. Biking from Santa Barbara to Ventura with a colleague. Just the men.
It’s as if we created virtual chamams. In LoveDance, Mary meets with the women during her monthly periods in the baths. A special time just for them, taking care of one another.
I believe caring for one another out of love not expectation, taking joy in the service of our beloved is key to our long and happy marriage.
Last summer, I had an amazing dream that reminded me of an aspect of the Divine Masculine that has been forgotten, yet I see it so clearly in my husband.
The Golden Bear
In my dream I was entering the Home Depot through the lumber department to get to the garden center. I was going to buy jasmine. The center of the Home Depot was a raised platform and as I ascended the steps to the platform, a great golden bear came through the door. It was huge, larger than life, a golden orange color, translucent, brilliantly colored like a child’s crayon, surreal. I was the only one to see it. It snuffled around the entry and I crouched down on the steps. It snuffled its way over to me. And snuffled my hair, my face, my neck. Then tapped a great claw over my right eye, then over my third eye, again and again. Then it hunkered down over me like a mother bear over a cub. Yet I knew this bear was male. I felt loved and protected like when Steve throws a leg over me, pulls me into his body—trapped by love. Trapped under the bear, I was secure, feeling the soft fur of its belly, the weight of its body, the warmth, the mass…protected in a golden cave of bear energy. Then the bear transformed into a…man. I could feel his naked body, the roughness of his hair, the shift in weight, mass, warmth from bear to man. We stood and faced each other. I was WOMAN and He was MAN…all men, naked, dark skinned and hair like a Mediterranean man. We took each others hands and then he disappeared. A woman friend of mine said… “That is the forgotten aspect of the Divine Masculine.” And I woke up.
When I lie in Steve’s arms, his leg pressing over mine—the weight, heat and furriness comfortable, secure, I am very grateful to have found my home in his heart.
I pray the GOLDEN BEAR ENERGY OF THE DIVINE MASCULINE becomes well known by all.
While I hope my writing is enlightening, in essence this blog is my healing journey. I have kept a journal since my youth. The pages have always welcomed me, comforted me in times of sorrow, and gave me space to place my reflections. In writing, I learn more about me, about my life, about my world. And usually it is what I cared most to record in my precious journal that I use to comfort others.
A weblog is so different. You lay yourself wide open and quite bare online…yet it is who I am…like the heroine of my book—Mary Magdalen—I unveil my heart and soul easily. I hope my musings serve you, my readers…for I do it in joy.
Love and Light,
Deborah
“LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter” was selected as the best Spiritual Fiction Book of 2007 by Reader Views Annual Literary Awards. Reader Views Annual Literary Awards were established to honor writers who self-published or had their books published by a small press, university press, or independent book publisher.
“Reader Views reviews more than 2,000 books per year from budding authors who have worked hard to achieve their dream of being published,” Reader Views Managing Editor Irene Watson says. “Our Annual Literary Awards recognize the very best of these up-and-coming authors, all talented writers who we know have very promising writing careers ahead of them.”
The Reader Views Annual Literary Awards are granted in 20 fiction and 30 nonfiction categories, as well as 15 specialized, sponsored categories. The entries are judged by Reader Views reviewers, all avid readers with a wide range of experiences, considered experts in the respective fields.
About LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter is an intimate unveiling of Mary Magdalen as a woman awakening to her sacred feminine power. LoveDance reveals the grace and the beauty of the times as well as the passion and the sorrow. Mary’s awakening will touch your heart and heal your soul.
Celebrity actress Kathryn Ross described LoveDance as “a lovely and timely book… Mary’s story is a parable for all of us. It’s time to get back in balance. Amazing that even 2000 plus years ago we were swayed or coerced into certain beliefs by politics and male dominated religion. Not too different from the present.”
History was written by men. LoveDance is HERstory. LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter may be purchased at www.lovedance.com
Get your autographed copy here
LoveDance is HERstory
It is a voice of the Shekhinah
It is a remembrance of the Sacred Feminine
LoveDance is the dance of the Divine within
It is reverence of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine
It is union of the split self through Sacred Marriage.
LoveDance is a path to awakening
It is the tale of a divine couple who knew their truth
It is your story.
LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter came to me in a dream.
Although I promised my patients and colleagues to finally reveal my secrets to optimal health in a self help book, the universe had different plans for me. My life’s work morphed into a novel. By writing Mary’s awakening, I began to receive my truth that in spite of my scientific training, I am an intuitive healer. My patients encouraged me to divulge the lessons from the book, so I released chapters of the first draft for feedback.
It should have been no surprise that my readers had transformational experiences, but I was in awe, because that’s what happened to me. I always believed in the profound potential within each of us. That’s how I believe healing occurs. It’s already encoded; we just have to tap in to the potential for it to become manifest.
My understanding of human consciousness is an evolution of the Mother-Father-Son-Daughter aspects of the Divine. Originally, humans worshipped the earth as the Divine Mother, her body was ours. Then we looked into the cosmos and envisioned the Divine Father as spirit. In the last two millennia, avatars teaching in parables initiated a revolution of the mind, and ever since the Divine Son has been the center of religious worship.
Now the time is ripe for the Divine Daughter to manifest in human consciousness. She is emotion weaving the mind, body, and soul into Sacred Unity with All That Is.
I believe Mary was the original embodiment of the Divine Daughter achieving Sacred Union with Yeshua, the embodiment of the Divine Son. Although lost in history due to the fear-based struggle between politics and religion, her story is fortunately being remembered. Writing from Mary Magdalen’s perspective helped me remember who I am. Sharing in her journey may help you, the reader, gain a remembrance of your truth.
As it turns out, I did write a healing book. Everything I wished to teach—the bio-psycho-spiritual healing lessons—are in LoveDance. In story form, the way a beloved avatar taught some two thousand years ago.
Abundant Joy,
Deborah
It’s coming. Soon, very soon. Fifty days from today, the world will receive the gift of Mary Magdalen. And in our remembrance of her, Mary Magdalen will bless us with compassion for finally receiving her truth.
Since writing in Mary’s perspective, my womb is Jewish, bleeding on this Day of Atonement—Yom Kippur. In Mary Magdalen’s time, blood sacrifices were common. Hebrew people made pilgrimage to the Holy Temple bringing unblemished birds and beasts as an offering to the priests—the Kohanim. And in exchange for the life of the animal, atonement was granted for mistakes—hatta’th—made in that year. For the Hebrew year of grace begins in the fall.
So 2000 years ago, how did Mary celebrate Yom Kippur? A journey to the Holy Temple in the heart of the Judaean desert from the basalt hills of Galilee. Her family would stay in her grandmother’s beautiful home in Bethany just east of Jerusalem. Although the world knows her as Mary Magdalen, her wealthy family had many homes—in Magdala, Cana, Tyre, Bethany. The poorer Hebrew families camped within the northern walls of the great fortress city of Jerusalem, while the rich sought shelter in the homes of relatives.
Not all Hebrews could make the sacred pilgrimage, especially if they traveled to the Holy Temple for Pesach in the spring. Most could not afford more than a couple of pilgrimages in their lifetimes. To leave crops and livestock, crafts and homes under the care of another was difficult. So most Hebrews spent this Day of Atonement in quiet meditation. Perhaps they asked forgiveness of their neighbors or prayed for their enemies.
The trip was long from Galilee to Jerusalem and longer in return, so Mary’s family would miss the harvest festival of Sucot. The tribes still paid tribute to the goddess with lavish fertility festivals, blessing the next year’s harvest. Mary’s Tzadokim mother would not have her daughters participate in the ancient tradition. But after her marriage to Yeshua, nothing stops Mary from awakening to her sacred feminine truth.
From ancient Sumerian times, the years were counted from harvest to harvest. Tomorrow on the Autumn Equinox begins a new year of birth. The Great Mother labors to bear her most precious creation. Fifty days of breath, of hope, of tears…and the Divine Daughter will be delivered into our consciousness—on November 11th 2007.
Open your heart to receive her…in LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter.
∞
While having coffee with two Ethiopian friends—he’s an environmental scientist; she’s an epidemiologist—I shared my clinical expertise on holistic alternative treatments for her mother’s arthritis. Afterwards, she commented on my happy energy—I was the dancing queen at a housewarming party—as if I was an enigma. And at the same party another old friend wished to engage me in a serious spiritual conversation, but the music was too tempting, passion was in the air, studiousness took a backseat to joyful celebration. How difficult is it to comprehend the mix of precious wisdom and abandoned delight?
Going out in the world to speak to my colleagues or present my work to the public, I am expected to dress and act a certain way. Would I be taken more seriously if I wound my long hair in a bun, wore dark-rimmed glasses and high collared suits? Why must a powerful woman emulate a man? Why can’t we partake of the wisdom of a brilliant mind which is packaged in a ripe luscious form?
Because it is the nature of human consciousness to create duality out of Oneness. Long, long ago we severed the Sacred Feminine aspect of the Divine into two. One—a pure wise goddess. The other—a sexy siren. The Greeks have Athena the virgin goddess of wisdom and Aphrodite the goddess of love, beauty and the patron of prostitutes. The Romans had wise Minerva and lovely Venus. The Hindus have the virtuous goddess of wisdom Saraswathi and the sacred prostitute Lakshmi the goddess of abundance; the Buddhists have life-giving Tara and wrathful Lha mo; the Sumerians have Ninhursag the earth mother goddess and Lilith the daughter temptress; and the Christians have Mary—the virgin mother and Mary Magdalen—the whore.
The “virgin” is wholeness, exclusive, impenetrable gestating potential. She sits upon the sacred pedestal, untouchable yet revered by humanity. She is the mother—the gan eden—the womb. The Divine Mother is the earthly body—the firmament upon which reality exists.
The “whore” is expansive, all inclusive, living all possibilities, sharing all with everyone. Her experiences are universal, sensually oriented so that those in the earthly realm may taste, touch, hear, feel and see what she perceives. She is the daughter—the lover—the bride. The Divine Daughter is emotion uniting body, mind, and soul.
Humanity spent thousands of years worshipping the mother energies as Gaia the body of life, then looked up into the cosmos and began revering the father energies as soul separate from form. Around the time of the Buddha, through Muhammad, and epitomized by Yeshua—the son energies emerged—teaching in parables, engaging the mind, the Divine Son uses blade-like energies to carve consciousness.
While the Sumerians used the blade (^) to denote the masculine, the chalice (V) represented the feminine—the womb-like aspect of the Divine filled with potential life, the everlasting cup overflowing with abundant wisdom.
Now is the time of the daughter energies—no longer is the sacred chalice to be held upside down and wielded as a weapon to control human emotion, but the Holy Grail shall be filled with abundant joy and wisdom.
Perhaps Mary Magdalen with her uncovered hair baring her wisdom to all who dared to partake of her as the goddess Sophia was considered a “whore” in comparison to the mother Mary who was the “virgin”.
Let’s examine the language. Whore comes from the Gallic horas which means beloved woman. The ancients revered the horas who shared their talents of healing and enlightenment by bestowing gifts in honor and gratitude. Like much from the ancient world, concepts filtered through Puritan ideals in Victorian times have become adulterated. A once revered spiritual healer becomes an abhorred prostitute.
I have an affinity to Mary Magdalen, for like she, I bare all to most everyone, sharing my essence and my presence to teach and heal. Perhaps birthing LoveDance into the world will help heal the divided goddess. I can only pray it is so.
Blessings of Abundant Joy,
Deborah
I am a woman, a mother, a sister, a wife.
I am a friend, a teacher, a dancer, a healer.
I am on a great journey to find my Self.
Join me.
In 1984, I gave birth to a very special baby. Stumping medical experts, my son faced adversity with the wisdom of an old soul becoming my impetus to bridge the gap between the physical and the spiritual. During the harmonic convergence in 1987, I conceived a daughter. Consciously parenting two enlightened children prepared the way for an influx of Indigo children and their parents forcing me to expand my conventional medical training into a holistic healing model.
I am a board certified family nurse practitioner specializing in neuro-immune-endocrinology. I have a busy holistic practice—Full Circle Family Health—and created a nutritional formula to support my patients on their healing journeys—Genesis Gold®. Although I promised my patients and colleagues to finally reveal my secrets to optimal health in a self help book, the universe had different plans for me. My life’s work morphed into a novel.
Writing a story was like conceiving a child—passionate emotion—publishing was like a very long gestation—growing, changing, waiting—now in the presale period, I feel like I’m in transition—the baby’s stuck in the birth canal and my ob-gyn is out playing golf! So I blog this enlightening journey as I wait for LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter to be born. {She’s due this fall…I hope I can remember the Lamaze breathing J}
As it turns out, I did write a healing book. Everything I wished to teach—the bio-psycho-spiritual healing lessons—are in LoveDance—in story form, the way a beloved avatar taught some two thousand years ago.
Abundant Joy, Deborah
LoveDance 