healing

23. PRECIOUS

I’ve always felt precious. My mother called me her precious daughter until the day she died. My father treats me as if I am a precious gift. My grandparents beheld me with preciousness in their gaze. My aunt and uncle speak of their brief time with me as precious. And I have always felt life is precious. That my relationship with Steve is precious. That my children are precious gifts to me.

So how can preciousness and unworthiness live in one being? Because we live in a dualistic world. We are both self and other. We are both light and dark. We are both divine and human. We are in duality. In duality, we develop our sense of self, our egos. Our ego serves to differentiate us from others. Only when we drop the veil of ego can we be one with all that is. Yet being human, we need differentiation to appreciate connection.

My parents perceived my divine light. And I knew myself as precious until I developed my ego. Then under the veil of ego, I felt separation from all that is and began to feel unworthy. I could no longer perceive my own divine light.

While cleaning a stained-glass lamp, it came to me. The inner light was dull due to the dust of time. Yet polishing the outside of the glass did little to increase the brightness of the light. I had to polish the inside of the glass. Only then did the light shine with its true brilliance.

Same with us. We work so hard polishing our outer selves. Perfecting our appearances, our bodies, our faces, our clothes, the cars we drive, the houses we live in, the people we hang out with, the money in the bank, the roles we play…lots of time polishing our outsides… Never quite good enough always striving for more. Thinner, younger, prettier, stronger, richer, more successful.

Yet until we dive deep within to rediscover our preciousness do we spend time polishing our inner selves. Removing the dust accumulated over the years…the childhood traumas we reflexively relive, the generational thinking we carry as karmic imprints, the old paradigm beliefs we are afraid to give up…until we polish our inner selves does our divine light shine brightly enough for us to see it reflected in the world. In the faces of our family and friends, in our works, in our connection with the earth, in all of our lives.

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Excerpt from My LoveDance. Available on Amazon

14. FOUR FACES OF THE ONE

As I waited for Genesis Gold® to be manufactured I sat down to write my opus—Hormones in Harmony®—what I was known for, all my healing secrets. Yet it wasn’t coming easily. In spite of all the case studies and stories, I could not seem to get it down. And I am a prolific writer. I have a whole cedar chest filled with my handwritten journals, poetry, short stories, novelettes…yet what I do best was not coming…

2-1-03 Finally I sat in meditation, awakening early by the light of the day while my animal charges continued to slumber. Upon my couch I sat still and quiet and within moments and lasting what seemed an eternity I was visited. The Father, the Mother, the Son and the Daughter came unto me. I envisioned their form through closed eyes, yet felt them intimately interacting with my physical being, touching my aura within and without.

The Father held the space balancing the energy confirming the wisdom of the Mother and Son. The Daughter was beautiful to behold and when I asked who she was I was told Shekhina and I saw that she was a huge version of Me! Full voluptuous body, moving gracefully through space and time, glowing with a golden love light dancing sensuously to the vibration of the moment. She had my face, my hair, my eyes, she was me lovely to behold.

The Mother gave me her wisdom through counsel and vibration. When I asked what I was to do, she said I had done enough that all was progressing as it should, that Genesis Gold® would come in its own time as divinely planned. I was to write, only write. I asked which books to begin with and she said there is one book, all the stories are part of the one. My story, all of it. Not Hormones in Harmony® separately, but inclusive as is my understanding. The Son concurred stating that unlike Christ my true story would come out while I was still alive and the work would unfold from the telling of it.

I was told that I was to use my gift in energy healing to minister to a patient- Eddie- whose cancer was based in his fear, that I would be guided as to what physical support systems he would need and that yes, Genesis Gold® was necessary, but would come too late. I know that people come into my life for a purpose, some to stay and some for just fractions of eternity. All part of the web of love connected with the white gold filaments of alchemized truth.

The Mother guided me to understand that like a teenage girl, I needed many mirrors to assure myself of my truth and confirm what I perceived as blemishes, as imperfections. Those I call my mentors have been these mirrors for me. They guide me with such finesse, because I am witnessing myself. It is my connectedness that makes their counsel, their channeling, their energy healing so profound. It is me.

Excerpt from My LoveDance. Available on Amazon

12. PARTNERING WITH MY PATIENTS

After nine years of working as an employee first at an urgent care then with an ob-gyn, I had a dream…to start my own holistic health care practice.

So I left a private practice seeing 27 or more patients a day as an employee to slow down and spend quality time with my own patients; time that they gratefully compensated me for and then submitted their completed bill of services to their own insurance. Finally I was independent of the insurance industry. Soon a trend began as patients invested in their care became increasingly more responsible for their health.

My dearest patients supported my entrepreneurial nature by following me into my new integrative medical practice—Full Circle Family Health. One day I was evaluating a woman with postmenopausal bleeding and had an uneasy feeling. A few years earlier my intuition led me to discover a rare growth on her liver. She trusted my feelings and did not hesitate to agree to an ultrasound. That’s when we discovered the tumor.

I had diagnosed patients with cancer before. I had even lost a few to the disease. But this beloved patient was different. Her cancer became our dance floor. I learned to partner with Barbara to the rhythm of her dis-ease, to the changing beat of her desire, to the symphony of her life’s purpose. I held nothing back, dancing with her through choices that I may not have chosen, orchestrating a care plan that fit her needs—physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I researched every option, conventional and alternative. She fought the good fight, but in the end…she showed me how to slow dance.

On the morning of her death, I felt Barbara as a bubble of delight floating through me. Not an hour later, her daughter called to tell me she had just passed. For the first time in 25 years of healing, I experienced the grace of death.

Like most health care professionals, I had viewed death of a patient as a failure and could not fully receive the gift of their passing. But hers, I embraced. I surrendered to loving her as a person, to getting close to her family, to being a part of her circle—truly Full Circle Family Health.

At the funeral, others commended me for coming. How could I not? I came to honor her, to support her family and to let her go. Like many of her loved ones, I shared my thoughts. Mostly I thanked her delightful spirit, free now from pain playing with her little grandson.
This is the way it used to be. Before insurance carriers and malpractice, we used to get involved with our patients. We knew their families, we birthed them, we helped them get through tough times in their lives, and we buried them. We understood the circle of life. They understood too. We respected one another; we were part of a community.

As I dance my dreams into reality, they expand to encompass all I love. Transforming my health care practice into one that supports my relationships, my health and my soul purpose—my LoveDance®—has allowed me to model a healthy balanced life which helps my patients achieve their goals. And those who are ripe for healing arrive from across the globe. They come because I dance their dance.

Excerpt from My LoveDance. Available on Amazon

Emerging from Parasitic to Partnership in our Health Care System

Since being back in the throng of conventional medicine it has become very clear to me that our health care system is parasitic. It feeds off dis-ease.

Insurance pays poorly or not at all for health education to empower patients. It pays by diagnoses—the more dis-eased, the more it pays. Yet you cannot treat everything at once.

No, insurances do not pay well if you try to take care of all the patient’s concerns in one visit. It pays to have the patient come back and back again for each complaint.

And there is no time to educate, let alone empower the patient.

Our health care system encourages parasitic relationships between health care providers and patients. If you get them well, you lose money.

I once worked for a doctor who complained that I gave the patients too much information. He said: If they know too much, they won’t need us.

I left his parasitic practice and opened my own—a symbiotic health care practice. Free from the confines of insurance reimbursement, I am able to spend time educating my patients. And they got better. And then they send their friends and family. I never advertise—my whole practice is word of mouth referrals.

My work began by insisting on symbiotic relationships with my patients. We became partners in their health care. I educated rather than medicated. I tried to shine the light of illumination on their dis-ease. How their lifestyle choices, environmental influences, and belief systems affected their physiology.

What maladaptive genes might be lurking in their DNA and how to change their genetic expression. Yes, it is possible to transform DNA—it’s why I created Genesis Gold.

I’ve found that Genesis Gold often brings our parasitic relationships up to the surface of our consciousness. I created Genesis Gold to heal maladaptive genetic expression—one of which is vulnerability to parasites. Our body mirrors our soul’s lessons. Genesis Gold illuminates that which no longer serves, so we might release it.

As my patients take more responsibility, own their knowledge, transform their lives, they experience gnosis—they “know” innately in their bodies the truth of their dis-ease and begin to heal.

So when the time is ripe, dig in and muck out your parasites—inside and out.

And I shall work on the health care system by teaching patients how to partner with their health care providers.

Death and the White Light

Eddie. He came to me in the fall of 2002, diagnosed with lung cancer. His lawyer, a patient of mine, suggested he consult with me, as a clinical endocrine advisor in a research project using natural progesterone to treat cancer at the Sansum Medical Clinic. Cancer is not my specialty. I specialize in neuro-immune-endocrinology which I believe is at the core of most dis-ease. So I spent two hours going over his history, looking for signs of age-related decline that could be at the root of his illness, trying to understand why this brilliant man’s body was failing him at 52, and explaining the biochemistry of cancer as related to the complicated system of hormonal miscommunication with DNA.

Exuding enthusiasm, Eddie asked, “So you have something to balance my ligands?” He was brilliant, one of the only patients who understood the scientific lingo of my theories. He was even open to the psycho-spiritual roots of dis-ease, including the irony of being afflicted with cancer after inventing thermal implants to treat brain tumors.

In fact, I did have something for him—my Genesis Gold® formula to balance the hypothalamic orchestration of the neuro-immune-endocrine system—but, in theory only. After completing pilot studies the year before, my personal funds ran out and I struggled to find a manufacturer to mix even a small batch. Eddie took my hand and offered to help.

“No,” I protested, “you came here for me to help you.”

“Perhaps I came to help you. My cancer was a fortuitous portal for our meeting.”

Thus began our journey to manufacture my formula so he might partake of it. He truly believed he would be cured by my invention. In the meantime, I recommended a natural treatment regime, since he was opposed to traditional therapies, and spent much time counseling him and sharing many spiritual portals. He treated me as a beloved daughter, introducing me to colleagues who would forge the path to the birth my nutraceutical product. Becoming attached, I searched for cures for his cancer.

The day I brought the first bottle of Genesis Gold® to him, he smiled, beckoned me closer and whispered, “I knew you could do it.”

It was his last lucid moment. At the request of his family I had been coming to his lovely villa in the hills of Santa Barbara to help him die. As a nurse practitioner, I treated the walking well. Some patients had passed over the years, usually of old age, occasionally untimely, but not since being a neophyte nurse had I witnessed death.

After graduating nursing school in 1983, I worked on a surgical floor at UCLA Medical Center. We saw the sickest of patients—heart transplants, complete surgical resections of the bowels, lung resections. My first encounter with death was a young woman, my age, dying of pancreatic cancer. When I arrived on the night shift and saw her Do Not Resuscitate order, I knew her family and physicians had given up. Not me! I was not going to let her drown in her own secretions and stayed by her bedside suctioning her tracheostomy. Her intern refused to give me a permanent suction order so that I would take care of my other three patients, so I handed him the suction catheter and called the chief resident. My colleagues were appalled. No one called the chief in the middle of the night, especially not a nurse.

Amazingly, he wasn’t upset, but asked if I saw the DNR order. “Doctor, I’m not resuscitating her. I just don’t want her to be alone. I…” Seeing the intern escape down the hall, I tried to hang up on the chief.

“Oh, no, you don’t. We’re going to discuss why you can’t let her die.” I resisted, but he kept me on the phone until it was too late.

The charge nurse helped me prepare the young woman’s body for the morgue. And with tears, I was forced to let my patient go.

Twenty years later, I was not so resistant. Eddie’s family left me alone with him. I sat at his bedside and meditated on how I could help him pass. I had already counseled with each of his family members. When I thought of his recalcitrant son who had finally agreed to see his father after our phone conversation that morning, I felt a wave of gratitude. And it wasn’t mine, it was from Eddie. I opened my eyes.

His diminished energy, faded to non-existent in his limbs, now concentrated in his heart chakra, shimmered, and I gasped to see a funnel of light connect to him. He appeared to lift from his form—pure white light not the fiery red of his life force—and enter the conical shaped energy. Other light forms greeted him, ancestors and guides, passing him along to the end. And at the infinite end of this brilliant white light was pure Love. He was enveloped, embraced like long lost lovers, the encounter so intimate; I was torn between turning away in deference to such a private moment and watching in awe.

Suddenly, Eddie’s essence turned away from the Light and I was swept up to see from his perspective. It appeared as if the room where his body lay, even me at his bedside, existed in a fishbowl. The reality was the Light, the physical existence, an illusion. So peaceful, so blissful, the light was very familiar to me.

I remember calling in the White Light to protect my little sisters while I was away at kindergarten and invoking the same White Light to surround my own children whenever I dropped them off for school. If I would forget, my daughter would remind me, “Mommy, do the White Light,” and I would swaddle her and her brother in the protection of the Light that had always comforted me. In that eternal moment, I recalled how the same White Light seemed to bathe my patients and me during a healing and was the one I used to calm injured animals before treating them.

I’ve never been afraid of dying, although letting others go was difficult. My fear lay in being alone, separated from those I love by death. As a healer, I had taken a very long time to release my savior complex, to understand that I was not responsible for my patients’ illnesses, nor could I take credit for their cures. I was a midwife to their healing, holding the space in which they recovered or not—it’s always their choice.

That night after his son came to his bedside to say goodbye, Eddie died.

Two months later, I received one of my greatest openings and began writing my life’s work. Never a moment of writer’s block, it all just flowed in. The synchronicity of events, from the creative process, to publishing LOVEDANCE®, to going out in the world to market has been amazing. Still, I am learning to ask for help and whenever I feel resistant, I hear Eddie, “Perhaps I am here to help you,” and open to receive another’s assistance.

Witnessing the rehearsal of his death was Eddie’s final gift to me. Death is a passing through the veil of illusion and into the truth. There is nothing to fear.

Becoming whole by writing…

When I began to write in the summer of 2003, I meant to write a healing book. Something in the lines of Hormones in Harmony®—a self help book to address the needs of baby boomers. But my muse evaded me, until I had a dream. I was Mary Magdalen dancing down the streets of Nazareth.

In writing a novel, you lose yourself to the story. You live it, breathe, become it. For those eight months, I was Mary. I truly wish to finish HERstory, but hesitate to lose myself again. Yet now with so many readers reporting some amazing healings after reading LoveDance, I have rediscovered my wholeness as an author and a healer.

Many of you cannot wait for Book II in the LoveDance trilogy. I finally completed it and am weighing the option of self publishing versus finding an agent. The muse was as strong as ever, yet this time, perhaps because I awakened with Mary, I am realizing my potential—balancing life, family, and work with the birth of my newest creation.

Many Blessings,

Deborah

I am a Healing Bridge

As an Intuitive Integrative Nurse Practitioner, I bridge together the science of medicing with the art of healing. Unveiling the root of dis-ease is my speciality.

Intutitive Integrative Medicine

Deborah Maragopoulos

At the surface, the roots are biochemical. Diving deeper psychological roots can be uncovered,

but the core issues are often spiritual.

The soul speaks through the body in the symbolic language of dis-ease.

I try to help my patients reach their greatest potential by creating Joyous Transformations—body, mind, and soul.

The time is ripe for me to share my pearls of wisdom with the world.

Dearest Deborah,

How can I ever thank you? It’s simply because of your loving kindness and extraordinary wisdom that I have my life back! I feel better than ever and never knew I could feel this great in my 40’s and beyond! You’ve definitely found your calling and are answering it! Thank you! You are most certainly a life saver!

With all my love and gratitude,

Janette Malibu, CA

Hormonally Challenged

Being a woman entering the thrills of the perimenopausal rollercoaster does not make me an expert. It does make me genuinely empathetic with the Hormonally Challenged.

Being a neuro-immune-endocrine specialist for the past twenty years…well, that contributes to my expertise regarding hormones.

Yet as I receive more and more Hormonally Challenged patients into my holistic health care practice, my expertise becomes more and more refined. Like good wine, it takes years to reach the peak flavor of healing.

In 1997, I broke away from a conventional medical setting to begin an Intuitive Integrative Medicine practice. Full Circle Family Health is where I blend the Art of Healing with the Science of Medicine.

My specialty of natural hormones grew to encompass the gamut of endocrine disorders—diabetes, thyroid disease, adrenal deficiency, growth hormone deficiency, low metabolism, insomnia, fatigue, infertility, andropause, PMS, and anti-aging therapeutics. Still the majority of my patients were women going through the change of life.

One day I got a call from a local gynecological surgeon. “Deborah, I’m sending you all my weird hormone patients.”

I thanked him and asked what was so “weird” about them.

“Well, in medical school,” he answered, “you learn that A leads to B and occasionally C, but I get to Z and still can’t figure out these weird hormone cases.”

“That’s because, Dr G,” I explained, “endocrinology is not an exact science. It’s an art.”

“I’m a surgeon” he sighed. “you’re the artist, you can take care of them.”

That’s when I came up with the term—Hormonally Challenged. Health care providers are as challenged by hormonal issues as their patients.

My Hormone Story
Although conscious of being able to perceive things beyond my senses, I suppressed my gifts and pursued a scientific education to justify my “knowing.” Yet with the birth of my first baby, I could no longer deny my intuition.

Born Hormonally Challenged, my newborn stumped medical experts who advised a course of treatment that didn’t feel right. So I followed my intuition, against medical advice, and ushered my son through the maze of health care. My intuition proved correct. Scientific studies have since supported my decision.
In the midst of supporting my son through multiple corrective surgeries, I dreamt it was time to conceive my daughter. She was born full term, healthy, and very much connected. Consciously parenting bright, gifted children has been challenging, yet greatly rewarding.

When my son was later diagnosed with attention deficit disorder, I sought natural means to help him. And the universe gave me lots of opportunity to practice. Parents came from near and far with their developmentally delayed children to seek my care.

Intuitively, I felt that these children’s brains needed nourishment. Their parents willingly mixed the “brew” I prescribed because it worked, but they begged me to formulate a nutritional supplement to make it easier.

The hypothalamus is the master controller of the hormones, the immune system, and brain chemistry. Everything essential to life is orchestrated by the hypothalamus. The hormones literally sing to the DNA, and the DNA dances accordingly.

So I began intense research to find what I could feed the hypothalamus and harmonize the symphony of hormones, so the dance of the DNA can express health and vitality.

I believe healing is innate. If given the right ingredients, the body can heal itself. Searching for a nutritional support between genetics and the biochemical messengers of the neuro-immune-endocrine system, I was stymied until my son suggested I ask to be shown what to make. The answer came in a dream.

In My Dream…
I was standing before the Tree of Life, holding a golden chalice. My most Hormonally Challenged patients came to drink from the chalice and were healed. I awoke asking what was in the cup. The first answer came as seven Aramaic letters! Amazingly they translated into the same single letter denotations used for the seven amino acids I had been studying related to the hypothalamus.

For three months, I dreamt the same dream, awakening every morning with more ingredients for a special formula—nutritionally dense super foods to provide foundational support, herbs to support individual endocrine glands, the immune system and the brain, botanicals to enhance digestion and detoxification, and special amino acids to balance the hypothalamus— everything the body needs to optimize genetic potential.

This is how Genesis Gold® came through me to you.

Genesis Gold- Creation in a Bottle

HEALING TRANSFORMATIONS

2015 has turned out to be a transformative year. So much change. Some of us will feel the transformation more acutely than others.

We might notice changes in sleep patterns. We may experience anxiety or depression, foggy thinking, low energy. We may experience the stress of some crazy events around us in our families, in our communities, in the world around us.

What was once true seems to shifting. What we once knew is relearned. Everything changes. Gold transforms to silver. Dark shifts to light.

In 1997 I decided to leave conventional medicine and go out on my own to start my own integrative health care practice. It’s been a journey and now I have come full circle. Ironic, since I named my practice—Full Circle Family Health. I wanted to get back to the root of health care, to be able to practice the art of healing, to use my scientific training to become a medical detective, to uncover the root of dis-ease, to find alternative therapies when allopathic medicine could not heal or was not the patient’s choice. And I did. I created a holistic health care practice that focused on individualized therapy for each patient by merging the science of medicine with the art of healing.

Full Circle Family Health allowed me to come out of the closet and practice Intuitive Integrative Medicine. And the patients came from around the world. By word of mouth, they found me. More and more difficult cases. Each one unique. And I developed unique integrative treatment protocols—nutritional, herbal, homeopathic, natural hormone therapy, lifestyle counseling and education, spiritual mentoring, focusing on the symbology of dis-ease and soul lessons. The farther on my spiritual path I journeyed, the more receptive my patients became to learning the mind-body-soul connections. As I healed, so did they.

Then the recession hit. And I fought back. I maintained my cash based practice. No, I never accepted insurance reimbursement. Patients paid for my services out of pocket then sought reimbursement from their insurance. And they got what they paid for. Individualized care that focused on prevention, education rather than medication, and healing therapeutics that fit their belief systems. And most awakened to their truth, their soul purpose became clear, they began expressing their authentic selves in all aspects of their lives. And they healed.

In 2000, I developed a nutritional product—Genesis Gold—that became my foundational therapy to heal neuro-immune-endocrine imbalances and optimize genetic potential. Of course, science has yet to prove genetic optimization, but the proof is in the pudding. Few of my patients came to me well, paying cash meant a bit of desperation on their part and a great deal of commitment. I was often the last of their many medical and alternative consults. They had journeyed far in seeking healing so by the time they came to see me, they were pretty worn out by the system. The disease oriented system. Not only that of conventional medicine, but even their alternative practitioners tended to focus on relieving symptoms rather than getting to the root of the issue. Not that I blame them, it’s what the majority of patients want. “Can you just make this go away, doc?”

I am a big believer in teaching a man to fish rather than fishing for him the rest of his life. Conventional medicine is about doctors doing the fishing. My nursing background taught me that unless patients are educated they will never learn to heal themselves. And really we do not heal them. I do not heal my patients, I teach them how to heal themselves by helping them remember their innate healing abilities. And I model that remembrance for them.

The proof is in the pudding. My patients are the pudding. And so am I. If I don’t walk my talk, how can I expect my patients to be able to live healthier lives? Not that I prescribe any one diet, exercise program, or lifestyle. There is not one diet that’s right for every body. Not one exercise regime or lifestyle that is best for everyone. Individualized therapy is the key. And that takes time. Time consulting with my patients, performing thorough physical exams, learning their way of learning, of healing, of making shifts, and trusting my innate gift as a healer to pick up on the subtle energy of imbalance, whether it is hormonal, neurochemical, chromosomal, mental, emotional, spiritual. Even more reason for me to keep as healthy as possible. Healing is vibrational. If I am in tune then I can feel when they are out of tune.

It’s why the eye doctor has the thickest glasses. We attract what we are, what we believe. And I believe in the healing potential of every body. So they come sick and leave well. Not the same day, yet over time, they learn to heal themselves. I teach what I know. And I know optimal wellness.

May You Experience Optimal Health,

Deborah Maragopoulos MN FNP-BC

 

TIME TO GATHER THE HEALING COUNCIL

One summer, I gave a healing workshop for my colleagues. Forty physicians, nurse practitioners, chiropractors, and naturopaths gathered near beautiful Lake Tahoe in California. The mountains serene, the audience open to receive my message, I shared pearls of healing wisdom from twenty years of practicing Intuitive Integrative Medicine.

After ending the workshop with a lesson from LoveDance (how to disentangle our cords of attachment), one young doctor clutched the book to his chest and said, “If you teach us what you know, then we can be your disciples.”

His friend laughed, “Do you even know what her book is about?”

He shook his head, “No, but the cover is so beautiful.”

“It’s about Mary Magdalen!”

“So I said something profound?” He wondered.

Yes, young doctor, you did.

May the council gather once again to heal this dimension—heart and soul.

Many Blessings,

Deborah

Deborah Maragopoulos MN FNP
Intuitive Integrative Health
www.lovedance.com

Life is a Dance

Connecting with the rhythm of another, we dance our dreams into reality.

As an author, speaker and healer, I work primarily with women. Why? Because when you heal a woman, you transform the lives of the men they love, the children they bear, all the people they choose to dance with.

LoveDance is the story of Mary Magdalen’s awakening. In writing her story, I healed myself.

LoveDance is my healing gift to you.

I invite you to join her journey and heal your soul.