August 6th, 1983 I married my beloved. We were sealed together for all eternity. We took it seriously…the sealing…although I have a certain amnesia when it comes to the secret temple ceremony. Sort of like Mary Magdalen. My life is loosely portrayed in Mary’s story. I called it LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter…but it is My LoveDance…my Awakening to my Divine Daughter Potential…and with that I became whole…fully embodying the Divine Mother and now becoming the Crone (the Divine Grandmother energy of the Triple Goddess).
I have a memory of being in my mother’s womb, looking between my legs to find NOTHING…and feeling great despair because I knew how hard it would be to accomplish my mission on earth in female form. Thank the goddess, the world shifted during my lifetime…or did I shift my world?
I have started writing my story so many times. I have lots of stories collected over the years…my experiences as a human being. I have read with interest other’s stories of their awakening to their power…especially women…who tend to be more intimate in their story telling. Mine is different, I believe, in that I came knowing this life was about joy. I remember a calm acceptance of the family I chose… a gentle leading of my mother and father as I taught them how to parent me. A shepherding of my sisters…protecting and guiding them. Then a great need to be me…yet perceiving the world as unsupportive…I arrested my blossoming womanhood until I met my beloved.
I do not remember a time when I was not in communication with the earth, with the animals, with the plants. I have always felt others…their hopes, their fears, their dis-ease…I sometimes heard their thoughts, but mostly knew their hearts…their truth…saw their divine light. I learned very early the system of being human. How not to get distracted by the unseen in order to be present in reality. It’s as if I have been able to maintain my 3D channel while simultaneously watching many other channels…some I gathered information from, some entertained me, some guided me.
The past and the future were intertwined with my present. I could always see my future, dreaming of it many years before it would come to pass. I learned very early to wrinkle time…I remember reading A Wrinkle in Time and knowing that the author knew how too. I also remember disappearing.
I slipped in and out of the reality in which my friends and family existed quite easily. Playing hide and seek, I used this ability. I did not think of it as a talent then, I just did it. Only in writing Mary’s story did I consider how I did it. Before Mary’s story came to me, I did not consider my past lives.
Well, I did have a dream just before dreaming I was Mary Magdalen. I was a gypsy in a concentration camp. My husband had been killed. My daughter had been safely removed from the country by my father. I was a healer and the Nazis were using my abilities to assist in their experiments. I found a way to thwart them by releasing the souls of their victims before they could finish torturing them. I worked with my deceased spouse (the same one I’m married to now) who would take their souls through the veil. I knew they would eventually kill me, but I was not frightened…rather excited by our subterfuge. I woke up in joyous wonder of that time.
I knew then as I know now that all is of the Divine. Yes, all…the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s a matter of perspective. It’s our choice how we perceive life’s events. We can choose fear as the container to hold our experiences. Or we can choose love.