Well, I finally published my memoir. Here’s an excerpt:
After reading my 50th birthday post on Facebook, an friend from elementary school came to see me as a patient. As if we were never separated…our friendship re-bloomed after 25 years apart. Then she read my book—LoveDance— and asked, “When did you begin your spiritual journey?”
I answered: When I realized I am spirit on a human journey.
I am living my dream. I feel it before it happens. I celebrate this grand adventure. I am living life in sacred relationship with my beloved husband of 33 years, with my enlightened children and their spouses, with my very human family who loves me in spite of my transformation, with my patients who come more and more ripe to receive healing, with my circle of friends who each dance beautifully with me in their uniquely loving ways.
Like most, I began my adult life playing the game of being human—I became a Human Doing. We are so good at Doing, yet not so good at Being. We judge ourselves by what we’ve accomplished, what we’ve done. One of my greatest life lessons has been to become a Human Being. I did this by remembering that I am not a human on a spiritual journey. I am spirit on a human journey.
I’ve always known. Yet the world around me didn’t seem ready to remember. Most of my life, I felt different than my sisters, my peers, my colleagues. I felt out of tune with them. I was dancing to a different beat. It wasn’t until I danced among other spiritual seekers that I realized my rhythm.
Yet I had little in common with the spiritual seekers. Most were seeking to ascend the human condition. Few lived in intimate relationships with others. I believe enlightenment is found in our human relationships. And so many spiritual seekers suffered in their human form. I don’t believe suffering is our innate human condition.
I believe in fully investing in this life here on earth. Allowing spirit to lead. Releasing mental constructs that no longer serve. Perceiving life through new senses. Feeling my emotions. Learning my soul lessons. Becoming more refined vibrationally. Upregulating my DNA so that I might enjoy the journey in physical form as I hold more light.
I don’t have a way to show you. I have my story. How I got to where I am—spiritually, mentally, and physically. My way of ascending. Perhaps it’s yours too. Perhaps in reading my story, you might remember who you are, why you are here, and where we are going.
Thanks to my curious friend, I know the time is ripe to share my story.
I’ve been writing since I was a teenager. Stories, novelettes, poetry and, of course, a diary. I even wrote letters to God. I did a bit of professional writing, published in health care journals, but it wasn’t until I wrote my first novel—LoveDance Awakening the Divine Daughter—did I find story telling to be the best way to teach. I share my stories when I consult with patients, when I lecture to audiences both professional and public, and when I am in circle with my women friends. Story is how we learn.
In this book, I am including writings from my past so you can see where I’ve come from. All of it is my truth as I understood it at the time.
While I hope my writing is enlightening, in essence this is my healing journey. I have kept a journal since my youth. The pages have always welcomed me, comforted me in times of sorrow, and gave me space to place my reflections. In writing, I learn more about me, about my life, about my world. And usually it is what I cared most to record in my precious journal that I use to comfort others.
A memoir lays you wide open and quite bare…yet it is who I am…like the heroine of my first book—Mary Magdalen—I unveil my heart and soul easily.
My first book LoveDance: Awakening the Divine Daughter is a novel. I started with fiction because I was afraid to tell my story. So I told HerStory and remembered the Sacred Feminine Way of Healing. I had been practicing it, in the guise of Intuitive Integrative Medicine, yet now I was living it, embodying the Sacred Feminine and finally felt whole.
And my healing practice which focused on treating the Hormonally Challenged expanded. I began openly treating the whole person. Body, Mind and Soul. As I began embodying my own LoveDance, I began to teach what I knew, really knew in my heart, in my soul, in every cell of my body…I knew how to heal. I knew how to be in relationship with men, women and children. I remembered how to dance with the Earth herself…my DNA was dancing health.
My husband, a retired police officer, says that taking an accident report from three witnesses reveals three different stories. Everyone has their unique perspective. Each of my family members has theirs. And I have mine. This is not their story. It is mine from my unique perspective.
My mother read my story ten years ago and didn’t agree. So I went deeper and left out what I assumed was her perspective and just presented mine. After reading this version of my story, she nodded, “Finally you’re telling your story, not mine.”
I am no longer hiding behind anyone else’s veil. I am ready to unveil my soul to you, my reader. Those in my story may not be ready to unveil theirs. So they are clothed by alias names. My mother was proud to be named by her given name…so she is who she is. She may have cast the veil from her face, but I am utterly naked. It is my nature to unveil my all to know myself more deeply, to share my experiences and what I have learned in being in human form on this beautiful earth.
I turned 55 on the Spring Equinox 2016. I have always known that the old me would not exist at this time. I am transforming. And now I share my journey with you, finally.
Love and Light,